How best to improve emotional and sexual intimacy

How to improve emotional and sexual intimacy

Keeping your intimate life together on track takes consistant effort, especially if you are both working and there are young children in the household! 

• Prioritise quality alone time together every week. If it is practically and financially possible try and get out of the house into a new environment. Novel experiences have been shown to increase testosterone the sex hormone.
• If you have to stay at home, make one night a week your special night. Have a bath together, massage each other, cook together, play a board game, share a favourite chocolate bar or bottle of wine, read to each other, make an adventure board of places you hope to visit or activities you would like to try and keep it updated regularly.
• Remember regular daily acts of kindness - kindness is one of the quickest and easiest ways to improve your connection.
• Improve your emotional connection by making a list of 10 questions each that you would like to know about each other. Try to think of questions that require emotional depth, for example what is your best and worst childhood memory? What do you admire most in a person? or what about the way you were parented would you change? Think of questions personal to your relationship. Showing an interest in one another increases emotional connection.
• Spend a week going to bed naked.
• Every night for a week before you turn off the lights take the time to say three things you appreciate in each other.
• Try and make each other laugh regularly, keeping fun in your relationship is a fantastic way to stay emotionally connected.
• Before bed, light a few candles put on some lovely music and slow dance naked. 
• Make an effort daily to try to better understand and empathise with your partner. We all wish to be truly 'known' by our partners, and for this to happen there must first be the interest, and then the patience and effort.
• Remember special days such as Birthdays and Anniversaries. Too many people overlook special days by saying they are 'Rubbish at buying presents'. Thoughtful gifts show that you care and that you have bothered to take the time. Also remember to be a grateful receiver, sometimes presents don't quite hit the mark, but always be kind with your comments. Just remember to keep the receipt!
• Try and go away alone together, even if only for one night a couple of times a year. New environments keep the relationship fresh. Get you children used to you going away now and again from an early age. Too many of the couples I see completely stop going away together once they have kids, remember to keep space and time for one another.
• Kiss and hug daily, build it into your day. If you find yourself making tea at the same time, stop for a moment for a hug. Always offer a hug and a kiss when leaving or arriving home.
• Hold hands when out walking.
• Take time to talk and listen.
• Prioritise the relationship and each other.