Start a conversation with your partner about screen time/phone use, today.
On average an adult in the Uk will spend 4hours and 37 minuits on their phone every day. That equates to a day a week, 6 days a month and 70 days a year. The majority of that time is spent on social media platforms. Just think how you could improve your relationship if you used even just a part of that phone time on improving your quality time together.
Without exception for every couple that I see in my Practise there will be a session where phone use is raised as a concern. Usually both will point their finger at the other, each complaining that the other is on their phone too much.
Let's be clear phones are wired to be addictive. In reality we all use our phones a bit too much, some more than others. But in some relationships they can become a major source of disconnection.
So if you want to take one positive step towards better connection today, start the conversation about how you are both going to try and better manage your phone use.
The conversation needs to be soft and supportive and not one of blame and criticism. Approach the subject as a partnership, stay away from trying to point score on who is better or worse with their screen time.
Try and together create some realistic rules around your phones. Times to consider as phone free time - in bed together, watching a film together, mealtimes, date night. Take small steps to begin with as you are more likely to succeed.
Phone can be connecting if you are sharing and enjoying content together, but when a partner is engrossed in their phone alone for long periods it can feel very disconnecting.
It can be helpful to entirely remove apps or games that you find particularly addictive.
Finally, some people will use their work as an excuse to always be on their phone, but everyone needs downtime away from work. So try to take a break in the evening and weekends and use the time to improve your quality time together as a couple.
Try and leave your phones in another room, because when they are next to you there is always the temptation to pick them up.
One of the main reasons cited for Divorce in 2025 was emotional disconnection. Keeping a check on screen time is an excellent step in committing to improving the quality of your time together.
